It is Facebook official. School is back in session. Moms everywhere are posting pictures of their kids starting school. The comment sections are filled with nostalgic posts about how little Johnny is growing up so fast. It is that time of year. But what you don’t see is all of the preparation leading up to the first day of school! Allow me to give you a glimpse of what really goes on.
School Supply Shopping
I am pretty sure Santa checks his list less than I have checked my kids’ school supply lists. Today, I went to three stores in search of a yellow folder with pockets and brads. All of the stores I went to only had yellow folders with punched holes. There were plenty of folders with brads and pockets at those stores, but none of them were yellow! I even debated buying a folder and painting it yellow. But after a glass of wine and some deep breaths, I found a yellow folder on Amazon! Nailed it!
I am giving myself a complex about my handwriting. I can already feel my kids’ teachers grading my writing, especially the lower elementary teachers. Maybe Karen was on to something with her label maker! The “Pinterest moms” are probably making cute labels with fancy fonts and unicorns for their kids. I have already started going old school with a permanent marker. It is too late to turn back now.
“Well, isn’t that special. I wrote my child’s first name in all capital letters. I only capitalized the first letter of her last name.” Let me pause to put my forehead into the palm of my hand.
Moms are posting on social media about how much school work their kids did over the summer. These moms are making us all look bad. Their summer schooling included lists, schedules, and highlighted agendas! Math and spelling at my house were The Prices Right and Wheel of Fortune. I kept it fun and festive with an occasional pop quiz. If there is 1 granola bar left and you take it (1-1=0), why are you leaving an empty box in the pantry?
Speaking of math, I’m running some quick calculations here. I have no idea how my kids will make it an entire day without 3 breakfasts, 4 snacks, and 2 lunches. I am crossing my fingers teachers will be heard over their growling stomachs.
Whether your kids did school work during the summer (mom high five) or yours took a brain break (also a mom high for you), you are doing a great job. Your kids feel loved, safe, and all of their limbs are still attached. You are an awesome mom.
Trying On Clothes
The fun is just beginning, though (heavy sarcasm). I have to see if (gasp) my boys’ uniforms from last year fit. Both are miserable. If death stares were fatal, I would have spent the entire morning dying, repeatedly. No one can remember how their limbs work or that pants actually need to be zipped and buttoned to ensure they fit. Trying on a single shirt is now a five-minute ordeal. In this process, one boy has fallen ill while the other thinks I cannot see him stuffing shorts in a drawer.
While my boys feel like they are being tortured, my daughter thinks they are having a fashion show without her. I’m sure the neighbors can hear her complaining over her brothers’ loud sighs. She is starting Kindergarten and has brand new uniforms she tried on in the store 2 days ago.
I literally don’t care. I want to mentally check the box that everyone has clothes that fit for school. So while the boys are moving slower than turtles in peanut butter, she is pretending my hallway is a runway. Who cares that every uniform is the exact same size and brand. She is trying on all of them.
Wait, Am I Ready?
I am exhausted just thinking about all the forms I will have to fill out when my kids get home. I have been married 16 years and have lived in the same house for over a decade. Nothing has changed. There has got to be a better way than filling out the same forms by hand yearly. I wonder if putting “nothing has changed” on this year’s forms is an option? Hmm…
Do you know what else going back to school means? Homework and tests. I feel like I am on Jeopardy helping my kids with school work. To make matters worse, I am so old that what I learned in school is becoming outdated. For instance, there are 5 oceans (not 4), Pluto is no longer a planet, and math has somehow changed. It’s a good thing Google, Alexa, and Siri have my back. It really does take a village to raise kids!
While I am making jokes about my kids starting back, I am honestly going to miss having them home. Shoot, I am tearing up just thinking about my little baby girl beginning Kindergarten. On the bright side, at least she will tell me all about her day. I am pretty sure this is not THE year my boys will ask me to pull up a chair so I can hear all about their day, but it doesn’t mean I will stop checking in with them. I even bought snacks in hopes I might get some intel now and then. You cannot blame a mom for trying.
Hope you have a wonderful school year and thanks for stopping by!